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Monday has arrived again so i thought that i would start the week off with offering a little advice...
''What's it going to be like having a boyfriend whilst i'm at uni?''. This is a question that i played over and over again in my head countless times after i opened my exam results last August and found out that i had been accepted into my university of choice.
Before moving the hour and a half away from home to Southampton i had spoken to several other girls who were going to be in the same position as me- we all wished we knew the answer to what it was going to be like, so now that i'm experiencing it, i want to give others an honest answer, and talk about the up's and down's that come with moving to university and away from your partner.
University will test your relationship, probably beyond anything before this time. You'll likely be madly in love with the person that you're with and can't bear the thought of breaking up. But, at the same time, you're ready to take on this whole new adventure, practically a new life- it can be an extremely confusing and stressful time. For me, it was simple. I loved my boyfriend and wanted to stay with him regardless- i didn't see how or why going to university would get in the way of that. Of course, distance plays a big part in this and like i said, my university is an hour and a half away, which isn't really that far but any distance shouldn't be an issue. If you're committed to making it work then even a 12 hour distance won't matter.
Becoming Independent
You need to remember that you're going to be experiencing a whole new world of living away. You'll be making new friends, discovering new passions, keeping up with your studies and doing lots of partying. At first, your schedule may leave you with little time to be with your partner, especially during freshers and registration (our freshers lasted two weeks). So, you do have to remember that it's going to be difficult for them to begin with - not only are you off having a new adventure without them, but you suddenly might not have as much time to spend with them. It's really important to make an effort and make sure you're keeping them updated with how you're doing, they're likely to be just as nervous as you, if not even more nervous.
''What's it going to be like having a boyfriend whilst i'm at uni?''. This is a question that i played over and over again in my head countless times after i opened my exam results last August and found out that i had been accepted into my university of choice.
Before moving the hour and a half away from home to Southampton i had spoken to several other girls who were going to be in the same position as me- we all wished we knew the answer to what it was going to be like, so now that i'm experiencing it, i want to give others an honest answer, and talk about the up's and down's that come with moving to university and away from your partner.
University will test your relationship, probably beyond anything before this time. You'll likely be madly in love with the person that you're with and can't bear the thought of breaking up. But, at the same time, you're ready to take on this whole new adventure, practically a new life- it can be an extremely confusing and stressful time. For me, it was simple. I loved my boyfriend and wanted to stay with him regardless- i didn't see how or why going to university would get in the way of that. Of course, distance plays a big part in this and like i said, my university is an hour and a half away, which isn't really that far but any distance shouldn't be an issue. If you're committed to making it work then even a 12 hour distance won't matter.
Becoming Independent
You need to remember that you're going to be experiencing a whole new world of living away. You'll be making new friends, discovering new passions, keeping up with your studies and doing lots of partying. At first, your schedule may leave you with little time to be with your partner, especially during freshers and registration (our freshers lasted two weeks). So, you do have to remember that it's going to be difficult for them to begin with - not only are you off having a new adventure without them, but you suddenly might not have as much time to spend with them. It's really important to make an effort and make sure you're keeping them updated with how you're doing, they're likely to be just as nervous as you, if not even more nervous.
Managing your time
During freshers week you'll find yourself out all night and sleeping all day (this was half true for me). which will probably be the other way around for your partner, especially if they have a day job. Your schedules might almost be opposite to each other, making it hard to find proper time to communicate with one another. With situations like this, balance is the key and everyone is different. Each couple will need to find their own balance and what works well for them.
Spending time by yourself
Alone time is important, and when you first start university you probably wont be getting a lot of it. Making new friends is pretty essential when you've moved to a city where you don't know anyone, and this doesn't happen overnight. You're likely to make friends with the people that you live with to begin with, and then you'll meet the people on your course. You never really stop making friends as nights out often lead to new friendships with people that you didn't know existed until you held their bag for them whilst they used the bathroom. Anyway, make sure that you set some time aside for yourself, like i said, balance is crucial...it keeps you sane.
''How do you not hook up with other guys?''
It's simple. if you love someone then you won't even be tempted to. Unless sweaty guys who are wearing too much aftershave and have been daring their mates to down dirty pints without being sick on themselves is what you desire in life. For some girls they might feel like they are being left out while all their friends are off getting with blokes down the back of Subway, but in reality they'll wake up the next day glad they had gone home with their mates with a greasy burger in their hand. There is one tough thing though...drunk texts and phone calls to your significant other. I am 100% guilty of this, and most of the time it is laughed off, but be considerate to them. If they have to be up for work in a few hours, do your best to hold off until the morning.
It is possible to have a happy and loving relationship whilst you're at university. And yes, it may be difficult at first and for some it might not work out, but stick at it. Just because it could be a bit of a struggle to begin with doesn't mean that it isn't worth it, because believe me it is.
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